About three days ago, while baking Christmas cookies,I realized I had not written an entry in quite a while. I happily, with only the tiniest bit of trepidation, recognized this as a positive thing.While humming along to Johnny Mathis Christmas album, I continued to review in my little mind all the positive things that have been happening with my boy.
He has straight A's at the Christmas break!! He has had clean drug tests for nearly four months and has had no anger, out-of-control outbursts in about the same amount of time. We can have a decent conversation as long as I control "my tone" and he actually has a great sense of humor. He is just one week away from fulfilling his contract to getting his drivers permit.
On the other hand.....he's involved in no sports, has no hobbies, is chewing tobacco and still insists on hanging out with "undesirables". Let me give you an example of my definition of an "undesirable". There's an 18 year old kid whom he often wants to go "driving around with" at odd hours of the day and night. I would think a young man at his age would have better things to do than hang out with my very immature 15 year old. Then there's, Adam (an alias), son of a preacher, who was in rehab for heroin over the summer, is flunking every class even though he's nearly two years behind already, and is constantly wanting money from my son to drive him to school, etc. Do these sound like kids you would want your son hanging with???
As you can see, I still have legitimate worries, but life in our house has definitely improved as the stress levels have receded. UNTIL.......this morning at 3:33am. The moment every parent hopes and prays will never happen. The dreaded phone call. "Your son is at the emergency room, he was involved in a car accident tonight." In a split second, a storm of thoughts and questions begin to swirl in your mind, the winds are picking up speed. This can't be, you think, he's spending the night at his friends house tonight, his dad is home. Now your heart is racing as you try to reach an acceptable state of awareness. The reality suddenly hits. OH MY GOD, IS HE DEAD!
The answer is NO, but he's going to wish he were dead when you're finished with him!
He has straight A's at the Christmas break!! He has had clean drug tests for nearly four months and has had no anger, out-of-control outbursts in about the same amount of time. We can have a decent conversation as long as I control "my tone" and he actually has a great sense of humor. He is just one week away from fulfilling his contract to getting his drivers permit.
On the other hand.....he's involved in no sports, has no hobbies, is chewing tobacco and still insists on hanging out with "undesirables". Let me give you an example of my definition of an "undesirable". There's an 18 year old kid whom he often wants to go "driving around with" at odd hours of the day and night. I would think a young man at his age would have better things to do than hang out with my very immature 15 year old. Then there's, Adam (an alias), son of a preacher, who was in rehab for heroin over the summer, is flunking every class even though he's nearly two years behind already, and is constantly wanting money from my son to drive him to school, etc. Do these sound like kids you would want your son hanging with???
As you can see, I still have legitimate worries, but life in our house has definitely improved as the stress levels have receded. UNTIL.......this morning at 3:33am. The moment every parent hopes and prays will never happen. The dreaded phone call. "Your son is at the emergency room, he was involved in a car accident tonight." In a split second, a storm of thoughts and questions begin to swirl in your mind, the winds are picking up speed. This can't be, you think, he's spending the night at his friends house tonight, his dad is home. Now your heart is racing as you try to reach an acceptable state of awareness. The reality suddenly hits. OH MY GOD, IS HE DEAD!
The answer is NO, but he's going to wish he were dead when you're finished with him!
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